You're Having a Woolly Scarf Mate!

Hey Tetley Tea-ers!

So it's Easter! Which means only 3 things:

1. Jesus did a really really REALLY cool thing. Big Up. We totes Love Him for his Amaze Awesomeness.

2. Lots of CHOCOLATE! Note to Man Friends , Dad the Lads, Brothers and Boyfs:  Girls need more chocolate then you boys. Yes we do. You see, we need to build up 'extra padding' to keep warm (and limit the moaning) through those totes freezing, toe-trembling, ears-breaking-off, nose-turning-blue nights. (Therefore feel free to (at any time) present your Sister/Daughter/Girlf/Lady friend with chocolate at will, at any time and do not question when it is demanded).
3. Time for Winter shopping! (yes I know its 28 degrees in Mossel Bay, but its Winter dammit!)

I am a Winter-Hater. Yes I am. I am, oh I am. I am a Summer-freak, a lover and indulger of all things that are warm, yellow, round and spits out rays of tanning-ness. Howevs.. I do like the Winter fashion (being British for all those many years, you gotta kinda master the art).

So I hit the shops for some retail therapy today with the Bee-Maker (Mom a.k.a Goddess of all things). After a mere 20 minutes, we managed to pick up a Winter bundle of awesomeness. I'm ready to rock and roll. I'm ready to kick Winters Ass so hard, it just may have second thoughts of visiting SA again. 

I'd like to think, that in my woolly getup, I look as cute as a button. Not to mention irresistible to all men (who the minute they see me will fall in love (and lust), want to pick me up and squeeze the 'Bee-jeezus' outta me (see what I did there?)).

There may also be the very small chance that perhaps my hat looks just a little like a Tea Cosy, and my scarf could definitely multi-task as a rather generous duvet... (does my neck look fat in this?) Ah well. If I look pants, then bugger that for a game of soldiers. I'm Warm So Screw It.

(Private Note to 'Hunky Man From Shop', if your reading this; there is plenty of room for 2 underneath my Tea Cosy).

Happy Easter my Bunnies!

Wills has changed his royal Relationship Status from 'engaged' to 'married'.

Since my career specialization is Online Marketing and this is a British Chick's blog, I thought this would be an appropriate link to post; Prince Willy and good ol' Kate's royal wedding being one of the hottest social media topics. Imagine the following scenario:


Important Priest Man: Do you, Prince Wills, take Catherine to be your lawfully wedding wife? Yes? Well quickly whip out your Blackberry then and get updating, cos everyone knows it ain't official till its on the Book of Face.


Like? Click here for the story.

Monday Mornings Suck.. but at least they're Cheap as Chips!

Good Monday morning!

Ok, not such a great Monday morning...  I have realized 3 things. Ok one fold:
This Monday morning, I have realised that bitches and bastards get rewarded in this life. However I have a question... In the end of it all, how does that get you first (or even business) class into Heaven?!

Second fold:
This past weekend I have realised that a douche couldn’t park properly and jaggedly-sliced my new car down the side. (My car has since retaliated and its battery committed suicide in an act of utter pissed off-ness) so thanks. Douche.

And third fold...
When I am drunk, I am not a liar. I tell the truth unexplainably, uncontrollably and without intention. That is... this is what I have always believed. Until Sat night (after being kicked in the teeth by 3 angry glasses of white wine; me and white wine = passionate love/hate relationship), I realised I do lie about one particular thing when drunk. What is that one thing? (I hear you question). How Drunk I Actually Am.

It usually goes something like this;

Me: but I loooove you!!!
Unfortunate-Friend-Who-is-Now-Designated-Driver: I know
Me: But I hate your shoes!
Unfortunate-Friend-Who-is-Now-Designated-Driver: really? 
Me: Yeh, and, and, and... Your new boyfriend is a bit of a Wally
Unfortunate-Friend-Who-is-Now-Designated-Driver: silence
Me: I’m DEEEEEEFINATELY not drunk.
Unfortunate-Friend-Who-is-Now-Designated-Driver: ok.

However Monday mornings are not all bad if you live in CT!

First fold (and take notes peeps – cos for today...);

• Spur: 2 for 1 burgers!
• Happy Hour at Arnolds between 430 and 630.
• Steak, chops, salad and mushroom sauce at Polana for only R50.
• 50% off sushi at Codfathers.
• R25 cocktails, R15 for draughts at Cafe Sofia.

Second fold.
These are the two top keywords that people typed into Google, and found this blog:

Classic.

Muslims Kick-Ass at Facebook

So.. apparently Indonesia has leapfrogged, high-tailed it, pegged it, legged it, Olympic'd it past the UK and settled in at the No 2 spot for most active Facebook users country in the Entire World. (Just under the US of A - naturally).

(Some Geeky-Nerdy-Googlized facts for ya'll; Indonesia contains 17,508 islands and is populated with 238+ million people).

(It also has the world's largest population of Muslims - I Wikipedia'd that). 

South Africa didn't even make it past Pakistan at number 30. I thought mine (coupled with Undercover-Blonde-Crazy Hair-Crazy Clothes-Crazy Boots-Boutique-Person's- you know who you are u minx!- combined daily useage of the book of face would jump South Africa right into No. 1 alone but whatevs. Stats are obviously bollocks). 

Facebook Stats April 2011

Facebook hey.. 'a stalkers dream come true'. 

Therefore maybe we Westerners should avoid Indonesia as a holiday destination? Just a thought. Pakistan seems to have less of a Stalking-Risk..

I'm a Slave for Her!

And.. She's back!

The Many Lives of Miss Britney Spears:

Oh, how I 'heart' the jacket slash 'Slave for You' vibe slash new hot bod.
Oh! How I need to revert back to 'au natural' again and go back blonde..

Its Britney biiiiitch

Survivor Story

Good Tequila Tuesday Tetley-Tea-ers!

So, if you know me - you will know I survived this Monster virus-thingy called Guillain Barre Syndrome. For those who don't know, it basically paralyzed me for yonks and landed me in an Intensive Care Unit on a life support machine (prime position by the window by the way - you only get that if you are a Permanent Resident).

-----Bee kickin' some GBS ass

Also got a waaayyyy rad cool article written up in Cosmo UK mag! 5 mins of fame..

Whoop whoop! So please guys,  sign up to my friend's blog - GBS South Africa


P.S - we are totally going to organize a Rockin' Partaaay with a load of Very Cool UK bands coming over to Cape Town to raise money for the GBS Turtle.. I will keep you posted...


P.P. S and I am Totally getting one of these bad boys..

OMFG indeed.

Fooled by Google

Anyone committed an April Fools act this morning? (Just so you know if you do it after 12pm you are officially known as  a Moron apparently).

I 'book of faced'  that I had; 'had enough and was leaving SA for good. Expect me back in the UK next month, I will miss you all'. Had a few heart attack phone calls (mainly by my mother admittedly), and one from a BFF who nonchalantly asked if I was planning on shipping my car.. and maybe she could look after my cat (and the car).

Google have always been the king of April Fools. Check out the success stories of Google's 'new' beta feature... here! (Check out the success stories).

I couldn't resist (obviously..) so I applied..

(FYI: Description 1 was: Blimps kill over One Americans per year.)

and got this...

Gotta love those Googs Geeks! And thats not all.. clickety clickety click-click HERE to see the full extent of Google's cheeky monkey antics.

It's the weekend baaaaaaaby!